Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
