I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize