So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
