I don't think brook has ever known best
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
