Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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