Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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