you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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