he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize