Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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