the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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