What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
