why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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