I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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