I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Michael Bay diarrhea
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize