I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
sex in a hospital.. check
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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