Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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