Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
