just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
