Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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