the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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