what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
