You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
