Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
