I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
