How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
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