Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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