Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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