I'm going to jail i love you
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I'm always down for nudity.
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