he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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