i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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