Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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