quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize