I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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