is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
