I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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