Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
how drunk are you?
Several
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
