I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
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