Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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