Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
