Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize