i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
