Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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