You made me cry and you don't even care
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
