Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
porn star boner night. come get it.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
