yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
