Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
