need another drink. this is the easiest way
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Randomize
