Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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