He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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