Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize