If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
The chlamydia really affected his face.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize