that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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